Prevent Potential (and Scary!)Work-in-Progress Disasters Via Your Pitch and Description

 Many writers don’t write a pitch or description for their novels until it’s finished but that’s likely a mistake. Both can reveal serious weaknesses in a manuscript so why wait?  It’s much easier to fix problems as you go along.

 I always write the pitch beforehand and use it as a mission statement, sometimes altering it along the way. As for the description, I write it after I’ve completed my first zero draft. My zero draft is mostly a lot of dialogue with some skimpy description and tops out at 35,000 words but all the major plot points and revelations are there. That makes it possible for me to write a description.

 If I’m struggling to write the description, something wonky might be going on with my structure. Most novel problems have to do with structure and can be daunting or impossible to fix if you’ve let it get away from you.

Also, once you know your structure is solid, you’re able to devote time to theme strengthening, character layering, and other attributes that make for a great read.  

Since I always practice what I preach, it’s time to share the title, pitch and description of my work-in-progress, started in September. An earlier post described how this has been a project that’s been percolating in mind for years.  

Title: The Woman Who Loved Halloween

(The first novel in a planned trilogy called the Savannah Crone Society)

Genre: Cozy fantasy.

Mash-Up:: Steel Magnolias meets Practical Magic  

Structual Pitch: A sunny and mostly agreeable Southern suburbanite who, despite strong objections from neighbors and family, is determined to create her creepiest Halloween display ever, but in the process, she accidentally summons a magical crone who not only makes her question her tame, cookie cutter lifestyle but also causes her to become overly candid with friends and family, threatening everything she holds dear.

PITCH ANALYSIS:

Desire: To top herself when it comes to creepy Halloween displays

Weakness: too agreeable

Inciting incident: crone appears and starts to communicate

Antagonist: Crone/ family and friends

Stakes: Might lose everyone she loves

Arc: (Implied) To become less conforming and more magical

(More info on writing pitches.)

Description:

Lindsay Sinclair, a sunny, 45-year-old watercolor dabbler, and a pillar of her community has one quirk: She loves Halloween decorations, the creepier the better, but she never expected one of her store-brought creatures to spring to life.

It started the day she bought Zara the Crone at the Home Depot in Summerhill, Georgia. Suddenly, the crone begins to talk, telling her that it’s time to start looking inward and embrace her latent crone magic, which will give her unimaginable powers.

Under Zara’s influence, Lindsay starts popping off at friends and family and any time she gets angry, glass breaks and lights flicker.  

Disturbed by this departure from the ordinary and worried about alienating those she loves. Lindsay visits a psychiatrist and starts taking anti-depressants. For a while, Zara is AWOL, but Lindsay misses how alive she felt when she was around.

She ditches her meds, learns to control Zara’s influences and finds a supportive female community called the Creative Crones who challenge her to take herself seriously as a painter. Their larger mission is to improve a troubled world through crone magic.  

Just as Lindsay begins to prioritize her artistic/magical side, her 21-year unwed daughter announces her pregnancy and hopes that her mom will help raise the child while she finishes college. That news kicks off a series of unpleasant revelations about her husband and friends, all which make her question the authenticity of her closest relationships.

Lindsay must decide if she wants to lead the latter half of her life according to other people’s expectations or if she wants to tap into her considerable crone magic.

 In order to write my description I included the structural highpoints of the manuscript:

 The inciting incident (the crone coming to life),

 Challenges of the new normal (Lindsay popping off),

Her attempts at acclimation to the new normal (taking the meds, learning to control outbursts, connecting with a new supportive community )

Ways the forces of antagonist double down (inability to make art, her daughter’s pregnancy and a reveal of her family and friends’ true colors when she tries to lead life on her terms)

 Her moment of character change.

You know you’ve done this correctly if your description reads like a story, one event springing from the next.                 

(More info on writing descriptions)

THIS WEEK IN PITCHING

Irony often elevates a story. The phrase “only to find” usually signals the incoming irony.

BAD BLOOD, in which a criminal lawyer has just been given her first big homicide case, only to find that it's her high school sweetheart on the stand—and he's been accused of a double murder back in their hometown

Mining the zeitgeist also make a story all the more intriguing.

THE BOOK OF LOST HOURS, pitched as evoking the mix of love story and touch of magic of ALL THE LIGHT YOU CANNOT SEE and THE MIDNIGHT LIBRARY, following the child of a German Jewish watchmaker who finds herself trapped in a mysterious place called the time space, where she walks like a shadow among the dead through memories of the past, and where living timekeepers are entering intent on destroying memories in order to maintain a version of history they deem to be best

Do you have a pitch you’d like me to evaluate in the newsletter? Send me a one-sentence pitch and I’ll critique it here. Pitches can be anonymous.

Also, I’ve updated the services I offer and still have a few spots left for query letter and pitch evaluations in October.

NEWS YOU CAN USE

In honor of Halloween, a thorough  article on writing a Gothic novel.

One reason some editors are ghosting agents is because their numbers have considerably dwindled.

I wrote the first draft of my novel in four weeks, so I identified with this article about why it’s important to write a compelling idea fast.

One of my favorite structure gurus

Alexandra Sokoloff

explains the meaning of a high-concept idea.

ON MY NIGHTSTAND

One of my dearest writing friends just happens to be a superstar when it comes to writing advice, and her book Intuitive Editing has become a classic craft book. Now she’s penned a new book that is a survival handbook for writers called The Intuitive Author: How to Grown and Sustain a Happier Writing Career

She’s been in the business for decades and really knows what it takes to make it as a writer.